01 · The friendly version
¿Puedes ayudarme?
Can you help me?
The default with friends, family, anyone your age or younger. Grammatically simple — the real skill is knowing when not to use it.
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Style Guide
Read the room, pick the right 'you', and hold the register — out loud.
Spanish has two levels of you, and the verb must match your choice: tú is informal (¿Puedes ayudarme?, te llamo, siéntate), usted is formal (¿Puede usted ayudarme?, le llamo, siéntese). The safe default: usted with strangers, elders and anyone professional, switching only when invited — ¿Nos tuteamos?. And the map matters: Argentina replaces tú with vos (¿tenés un momento?), Costa Rica uses usted even with friends, and in Bogotá usted between close friends isn't formal at all.
Below: greetings, requests and even email openers at each register, the vocabulary that shifts with them, the slips that mix registers mid-sentence — and a way to rehearse the switch out loud, not on a worksheet.
The warm-up pack
The same request, four different rooms — and how to know which one you're in.
01 · The friendly version
¿Puedes ayudarme?
Can you help me?
The default with friends, family, anyone your age or younger. Grammatically simple — the real skill is knowing when not to use it.
02 · The version you use with strangers
¿Puede usted ayudarme?
Could you help me? (formal)
Same request, formal shell. The verb changes from puedes to puede, and it carries the politeness entirely on its own.
03 · Down the hall vs across the boardroom
¡Hola! ¿Qué tal?
Hey! How's it going?
Casual, quick — the greeting you'd use with a friend at the door, not a client walking in.
04 · Same greeting, formal
Buenos días. ¿Cómo está usted?
Good morning. How are you?
Same moment, different room. Buenos días plus usted just says 'I don't know you yet' — never cold, just correct.
05 · Softening a request four notches up
¿Sería tan amable de pasarme la sal?
Would you be so kind as to pass me the salt?
The top of the politeness scale — the kind of phrasing that sounds impeccable in a bank or an office, overkill anywhere else.
06 · The everyday favor
¿Me haces un favor?
Can you do me a favor?
The low-stakes, between-friends ask. This is as far as the politeness needs to go with someone you know.
07 · Closing a friendly email
¡Un abrazo!
A hug!
One line tells the reader exactly how close you are — warm, informal, not something you'd send a client.
08 · Closing a formal one
Quedo a su disposición.
I remain at your disposal.
The professional sign-off. It never reads as cold — it's simply what a formal email is supposed to sound like.
09 · Asking permission to drop the formality
¿Nos tuteamos?
Shall we use tú?
The actual moment the switch happens. You don't decide alone — you offer, and wait for a yes.
10 · Reading the room the wrong way
Es raro tutear a un desconocido mayor.
It's odd to use tú with an older stranger.
Jumping to tú with someone older you've just met reads as presumptuous, not friendly — the instinct worth protecting.
11 · Staying consistent once you've picked
Es mejor empezar con usted.
It's better to start with usted.
When you're not sure, this is the rule that keeps you safe — start formal, and let the other person invite you in.
FLUENT
Finally, someone to talk to in Spanish.
Ten-minute spoken lessons. A teacher who answers back — and gently fixes what you got wrong.
First 10 lessons freeandbefluent.com/spanish/style-guideRegional Spanish
Textbooks teach one word. Locals use several — pick your region's and stay consistent.
| English | Mexico | Argentina |
|---|---|---|
| work / job (casual) | la chamba | el laburo |
| money (casual) | la lana | la guita |
| hey, what's up? | ¿qué onda? | ¿qué hacés, che? |
| that's great | qué chido | qué copado |
Watch out
The part no drill site can do
Carla
Your grammar teacher for this pack
No flashcards, no matching exercises — in the Style Guide lessons you talk, and Carla keeps flipping the social context under you. She hands you a request in street register and asks for it in a suit: ¿Puedes ayudarme? becomes ¿Podría usted ayudarme? — full verb agreement, no mixing. Then a slangy sentence to formalize on the spot: curro → trabajo, pasta → dinero, mola → es excelente. And when she finally offers ¿Nos tuteamos?, you have to make the switch mid-conversation — out loud, without dropping a verb ending.
Blank mid-sentence and nothing bad happens — she waits. That's the practice, without unnecessary judgement.
Finish the 6 lessons and Style Guide is yours — earned, not given.
First 10 lessons free · 10-minute spoken lessons · your AI coaching team remembers you
Quick answers
Start with usted — with strangers, elders, and in any professional setting. Let the other person invite the change with ¿Nos tuteamos?. In much of Latin America being too informal too fast costs you more than being briefly too formal.
In Argentina and Uruguay, vos replaces tú with its own verb forms: ¿tenés un momento? is the neutral everyday register, and asking permission to switch sounds odd between peers. Chile has a spoken version without the pronoun: ¿tenís un rato?.
Politeness scales with the verb: ¿Me pasas la sal? (informal) → ¿Podría ayudarme con esto? → ¿Sería tan amable de pasarme la sal? or ¿Tendría la amabilidad de ayudarme? at the very formal end — the kind of phrasing that sounds impeccable in banks and offices.
Open with Estimada Sra. García: — in Mexico with a colon, not a comma — then Me dirijo a usted para…. Close with Atentamente or Quedo a su disposición. To a friend it's simply ¡Hola, María! ¿Qué tal? Te escribo porque… and ¡Un abrazo!.
It depends where you are. Costa Rica uses usted even with friends and family; in Bogotá usted between close friends is normal, not stiff; in Mexico tú is fine with friends but usted is expected with in-laws and older clients. Whichever you choose, stay consistent within the conversation.